October 1, 2005

Paris Hilton, Paris Latsis Call Off Engagement

Paris Hilton has ended her five-month engagement to a Greek shipping heir, according to a published report.

The celebutante-turned-model broke off the wedding plans with Paris Latsis, according to a report posted Friday on Us Weekly's Web site, which quoted a statement it said Hilton released to the magazine.

This is such a crying shame. I was so looking forward to what girl Paris was referring to as a "royal wedding," as she said:

"But the actual event is going to have a royal theme and London is the only place to do that. I'm the closest thing to American royalty anyway. It's fitting really as the Queen is married to a Greek and so will I be."

"And so will I be?" She sounds pretty grammatically impoverished. You really have to question this claim of royalty. Did we ever see Princess Diana make porn tapes and show up in public several times with her actual vagina visible? No. We did not.

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