May 28, 2007

Splashosaurus, Seeing Red, Bad Celebrity Parents, Fug Mermaids, More

Evidence that many dinosaurs swam. Evidence that many humans are stupid, which is to say, a $27 million creationist museum has opened in Kentucky, asserting that dinosaurs were on Noah's Ark.

The evolutionary roots of red hair are revealed. “'It looks like red skin and hair became a sexual preference,'” said evolutionary biologist Molly Morris... it’s still socially—and sexually—relevant for an ape to see red.'" That must be why we're all so fascinated by the red butts on those mandrills when we go to the zoo.

Lindsay Lohan, recently released from detox at Wonderland into that honeymoon retox period, has been busted for DUI. (Oh, yeah, and she had cocaine in the car.) Her dumb dad has therefore been clamoring for cameras to blab at, since that's the only channel of communication he has with his daughter. Does this remind anyone else of Eminem's mom's "let's mend fences" rap a few years ago?

In 1493, somewhere near Haiti, Christopher Columbus saw three mermaids, and was disappointed by their lack of hotness. No, wait, those were manatees. Silly explorer.

Okay, cicadas are annoying and plentiful - to us humans. To zoo animals? They are yummy, yummy snacks.

A cool guy on YouTube is posting "how to" videos for people with prosthetic arms. Wanna know how to tie your shoe with one fleshly hand and one hook? He'll show you. With a smile.

2 comments:

Dan Telfer said...

AND Lindsay Lohan had COKE on her. Hahaha! Oh man, that girl be useless. I remember when I saw Mean Girls and thought she actually had a shot at relevance. Not so much.

Elizabeth McQuern said...

Oh, yeah, I forgot the coke - and she managed to leave the cocaine in the car, which was moved to a nearby parking lot after the accident. Poor thing, with those immature and self-centered parents.