September 18, 2008

The Ballad of Carrie Callahan

Last night Carrie came over and made us some snacktacular homemade pizza for dinner. Teresa, Nellie and Carrie and I had a delicious meal, then sat on the back balcony, taking about boys and dating and comedy stuff, and telling dumb dirty jokes and laughing until our stomachs hurt.

After Nellie and I walked Carrie to her bike, on a corner near our house, a man and woman walked by on the other side of the street. He was drunk, loud, and stupid, and telling the woman he was going to "punch her in the face...in front of these three motherfuckers over here," gesturing to us across the street.

Before I knew what was going on, Carrie was crossing the street with purposeful strides as Nellie and I stood there, sort of stunned. "What is she doing?" "I don't know." But we knew we had to follow her. We pushed Carrie's bike across the street, where Carrie had the police on her phone while the drunk idiot yelled homophobic and sexist slurs at us. The woman, probably terrified, said nothing. My hands were shaking and my heart was pounding as they finally walked away. I hate to think what the rest of that woman's evening was like.

Carrie Callahan, a small handful of human being, remained cool as a cucumber walking into the middle of a volatile situation to try to help a fellow human being. She did not hesitate. I hope her next stand-up intro goes like this: "Ladies and gentlemen, coming to the stage, a women who will bake you incredibly delicious pizza, make you laugh for several hours, and if your idiot asshole boyfriend ever threatens you in a public place, she has got your back...Miss Carrie Callahan!"

Here's a clip I edited of Carrie when she opened for our special Jared Logan show this year at Chicago Underground Comedy:

10 comments:

David said...

That is absolutely awesome. I always knew she was a badass, but this confirms it.

Nellie Ann said...

the pizza was amazing.the melon was amazing. the conversations were amazing. and my friends are amazing.

nancy huggins said...

I'm sure you have heard the song that says "Don't mess around with Jim" I guess they need to change JIM...to CARRIE huh?
You rock Carrie :)

Carrie said...

Thanks for such a nice post! I'm going to print it out and put it on my wall.

Elizabeth McQuern said...

Thanks for being so kickass, Carrie!

Nellie Ann said...

put it on your VISION BOARD!!!!!

I just blew my own mind!!!

Ronald said...

Carrie is the coolest! Tell her Ron Cayette says hello from phoenix,az. she is one of the coolest human beings i've met in recent memory, and she is certainly a certified bad ass!

Ronald said...

Carrie is the coolest! Tell her Ron Cayette says hello from phoenix,az. she is one of the coolest human beings i've met in recent memory, and she is certainly a certified bad ass!

Bubs said...

That is a wonderful story. Thanks for telling it. Your friend sounds like a real fine human.

nora said...

Yea Carrie!